No words for this

So I've been trying to come up with words to express my feelings about the massacre at Virginia Tech and I simply have none. There's nothing to say--it's too horrible for words. All I can hope is that the friends and families of the victims are being comforted by their loved ones and are finding ways to get through this difficult time. I wish I knew what I could do to help.

I'm finding that I can't get enough of the news coverage of the massacre. I went home for lunch yesterday for an icing session and read the entire three-page section about it in the Indy Star. I've been spending a good amount of time at work (we're slow this time of year) reading online news coverage. I can't make myself stop. It's not like I will ever understand why this had to happen.

The thing that has gotten to me the most is a quote by one of the killer's classmates, about how they joked about how one day they would hear about something Cho Heung-sei did. When she was told that it was Cho who had killed all those people, she burst into tears. He was a creative writing major, and his writing definitely pointed to violence and hatred. I remember reading some chilling and downright disturbing pieces while in fiction and poetry workshops at Knox. I do not think it's uncommon; many student writers feel that shocking their audiences is the best way to get a reaction, the bloodier and more violent the better. I know his classmates and professors are wrestling with their own guilt at not seeing how dangerous Cho was before, but really there was no way to know. I read the plays and yes, they are disturbing, but they're no worse than some other bad pieces of student writing I have read. I would not have thought Cho any more capable of these heinous acts than some students I knew at Knox.

It's such a waste, such a shame. These people might have grown up to be doctors, diplomats, peacemakers, or scientists. They could have been the ones to cure deadly diseases, negotiate peace in the Middle East, or devise solutions for the climate crisis. Now we'll never know, and those at Virginia Tech and the victims' families are left to pick up the pieces of shattered lives.